The Power of Identity

WHO AM I?

This a question that I would bet every person who has every existed has asked themselves. I believe that it's an instinctual part of us as humans to establish an identity for ourselves.  People have many different ways of identifying themselves.  It could be based on profession, income level, family role, personality traits, past mistakes etc., but regardless of what the factors are we all have an identity.  We often fail to realize the power that our identities can have and the how much control they exude over how we live our lives.  For example, think about why people who want to lose weight, beat an addiction or change any other type of behavior have periods of success and relapse.  It's because a change in behavior without a change in identity can only produce limited results.  If a person who still identifies themselves as an alcoholic, but is attempting to break the addiction may most likely have a relapse at some point. Why is that?  Because alcoholics drink excessively and as long as that person identifies themselves as an alcoholic, they will behave as an alcoholic. I believe the foundation of personal growth and change can be found in how a person identifies their role in this world.

I have experienced this type of success and setback myself. I made a conscious effort to choose a graduate program that would challenge me in ways that would develop my character. I needed to be challenged in more ways than just in classroom. The reason why is because I identified myself as a fearful person and I wanted to break the hold that fear has had over my life.  So I confronted my fear of the world and my voice. I made some great strides, but that wasn't enough. I still saw myself as a person filled with fear and of course despite my triumphs I still did things that a fearful person would do. In some situations I still shrank back, lowered my voice, chose not to show up and refused to raise my hand and be acknowledged. What I really needed was not just to do things to break out of my comfort zone, but I needed to see myself differently.  By seeing myself differently I would require more of myself.  A person's identity can empower or hinder. Now I am paying close attention to what I attribute to my identity and what behaviors or traits I simply identify as points of improvement.

Expanding my identity

One of the main things I am correcting is how I address my speech

impediment.  I will never again say that I am a stutterer, but that I simply have a stutter. That may not 
seem like a big difference to some, but from my perspective it can make tremendous impact.  Having a stutter just describes an innate impairment of a motor function, but I am a stutter makes it a part of my identity. My stutter has no direct influence on who I am, while my experiences as a stutterer have helped to shape my identity. The other facet of this that I'm focusing on is deciding how much of my identity is dependent on my present circumstances. In order to expand my identity and forcefully push myself to

reach my potential, I have to focus heavily on the vision for my future while still working to develop myself in the present. I don't have to wait until I achieve a certain level of success to identify myself as successful. If success becomes a fundamental piece of my identity now, then everything I do will be an effort to bridge the gap between my present and the vision for my future.  The same way that my identity as a fearful person has caused me to do certain things to bring that identity to fruition, creating a more positive identity will result in me making some substantial progress in my personal life and career. I now believe that it can be as simple as thinking and speaking positively can manifest positive results, while internalizing negativity will do the opposite. Now I'm tearing down the identity that I have unintentionally created and working to build a new identity that will empower me to achieve my goals as well as develop my character. Until that identity is completely defined, I will just say that I am...

A person who conquers fear.

The ULTIMATE Resource

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen" Hebrews 11:1 NJKV

I am delving deeper in my Tony Robbins program and was very excited to move on The Ultimate Resource volume.  Resources is very appropriate topic for me right now since I spend a considerable amount of time trying to figure out how to forge a path to success with access to limited resources, seeking out existing resources or people with resources and thinking of ways to create resources.  I was very intrigued to find out what Tony Robbins had dubbed the ULTIMATE RESOURCE and very surprised to hear him say faith.  Not time, talent, connections or wealth, but FAITH???? That's exactly the message I needed to hear because I had forgotten how far faith has taken me.  I had become so wrapped up in connections, skills, education and professional experience that I neglected that faith is what big dreams are built on.

The Bible's definition of faith is best I've read and it's also simplistic enough to relate to the smallest things in life that we take for granted to the awe-inspiring dreams that motivate us to do the impossible.  Faith is essentially believing in something that is not yet visible and this applies to much more than just God.  A person could have faith they have the potential to be a CEO, when they only middle management experience.  Or a young senator of Illinois could have faith that he could be president of The United States.  Some may think faith is completely illogical and even comical and it is.  But that's what makes it such an inspiration when we act on it.  Faith is what made me go get a passport when I didn't even have a destination.  Faith is what made me apply to an MBA program with a foreign language requirement when I only spoke English.  Faith is what made me investment money in Mandarin lessons for the same MBA program when my GMAT score didn't even measure up.  I saw myself in France, Brazil and China before there was an inkling of evidence that this could become a reality.  I was walking blindly into a future that only existed in my imagination, but that I believed would come to fruition.  

People have faith in things everyday without realizing it.  Why would people wait at bus stop when there is no bus in sight and the only proof that you have that it will be there at a certain time is a schedule?  Because it was there the previous day.  Their faith is reinforced by a previous experience.  Some might say that's not faith, but nothing is guaranteed in this world from one day to the next and just because something happened yesterday doesn't mean it will happen again.  Now how do you have faith in something that has no precedence?  That's when faith is tougher to manage, has more fulfilling rewards and more disappointing consequences.  Faith isn't always rewarded the way we envision.  Faith also teaches us hard lessons.  I have only given positive examples of faith, but I have more examples of disappointment than success.  Faith doesn't just reward; it teaches, refines and sharpens us for a later time and a better destination.

Resources can come and go very quickly in this world.  Market fluctuations can jeopardize a person's wealth, relationships dissolve, time is finite, but faith can exist in any circumstance.  If a person has nothing expect a vision, there is a chance to make it a reality when everything else indicates that it's an impossibility.  "The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation under everything that makes life worth living. It's our handle on what we can't see." Hebrews 11:1 MSG 

Think about this verse and think about the quality of a life without faith.       What's your vision? What do you have faith in?  

Below are a few points I took away from the Tony Robbins audio program I'm listening to.  Hope you find something that resonates with you and your life.

• Faith is what you turn to when you have reached the limits of your abilities, efforts and options
• Tragedy is only tragedy if we do nothing with it. 
• Find the lesson and purpose
• A lack of faith keeps us in positions that we have outgrown
• A lack of faith makes us think we are being punished when things go wrong instead of looking at the spiritual lessons
• Faith allows you to see opportunities in hard times
• Either focus on the present and think it will be your future or create your future and activate your faith to make it a reality
• Faith and fear are both imaginations unleashed
• We need philosophy and strategy to be successful
• • you need to know what you are doing and the purpose in what you're doing
  • success without purpose is empty
• First quality of leadership is faith
• • Lee Iacoca took existing resources and turned Chrysler into a leading automaker
  • He had faith in the company
  • Step into the future first